August 28, 2012

What it takes to have a Happy Marriage.

Taking a Leap of Faith

Every year thousands of couples take a leap of faith and commit to spend the rest of their lives with each other in love, peace and harmony through good times and bad. He buys the ring, she buys the dress and both look forward to the happy day with nervous anticipation. Barring the normal disapprovals and disagreements on trivial issues, parents are eventually happy for their children. The big day arrives and before God, family, relatives and friends, the couple promise to love each other come what may, regardless of poverty, illness or any other unforeseen circumstances. The optimistic individuals, intensely in love, promise to live with one another till death do them part!However, today's grim marriage statistics have a different story to tell. Divorce rates are climbing. The couples who stay together often forget their anniversaries, each other's birthdays, fight over the television remote and several eventually go down the road to separation or a stale mate at best. On the other hand, there are couples who still enjoy each other's company after decades of marriage. How do they do it? Disrespect, boredom, too much time on social networking sites and smart phones are a recipe for broken relationships, unhappiness and unrest.  to find an alternate hobby if you want to tighten those purse strings!

What can we do to stay true to the vows that we made to our partners on our wedding day? Much research has been done on the topic and we still don't have any definite answers. While I am no expert on the topic, I would like to share some truths about marriage that I have discovered through personal experience that I hope will help you in your marriage.

Rule 1:-The best marriages have nothing to do with how you look. As the saying goes, "Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder." You become the best looking people to each other because of all the years of love and adoration you put into your marriage and each other.

Rule 2:-The happiest couples are those who have a positive attitude. They are able to see the silver lining in any situation.

Rule3:-As the saying goes, "No husband was shot while doing the dishes." Helping each other with the chores or doing them together goes a long way in strengthening your relationship. 

Rule 4:-Divorce can sometimes be contagious. There are transient emotions and there are also enduring emotions. Sometimes we focus too much on what we feel at the spur of the moment and not on what brought us together in the first place - love, companionship and commitment. Sometimes when our close friends get divorced, it acts as a ripple effect and the tendency to focus on the negatives increases.

The bottom line is whether you're in it or you're looking to be in it, I believe marriage is an institution worth pursuing and protecting. It is an institution that cannot be replaced and will not become obsolete. When you put in every effort to make it work (and it takes a lot of effort!), marriage can be one of the most satisfying and rewarding experiences you will ever have. 

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